First, you have to wake up before the sun comes up. Enough said.
Second, you have to put so many layers on that you look like this:
Yes, this may be a fashion statement, but probably not one you want people remembering you ever wore. Just saying.
Third, you have to walk. Really far. Up hills. In the cold. Probably in snow.
Fourth, you have to be quiet. Like, really quiet. Have you met me? Not.gonna.happen.
And finally, IF you kill Bambi you then have to gut it and drag it to your wife who will grit her teeth and smile while silently thinking "*!@#&$@ there goes my Saturday. Looks like I'll be canning and freezing meat!"
Now don't forget, if you kill a deer you will have to have your picture taken with your kill so you can show all your friends on Facebook and Twitter how manly you are. This means that awful outfit you're wearing will forever being immortalized on film and I will laugh at you. True story.
I can think of a few more productive ways to use my time rather than sitting half way up a tree being quiet. This morning I've done two loads of laundry, fed the baby, made a batch of chocolate chip cookies, showered, cleaned the kitchen, and worked on homework. Oh, and it's only 9:30.
JR sat in a tree. He's returned home to nap because this hunting business is exhausting.
I should have been born a man.
I laughed out loud when I read your post, because it's so true! My mom and I like to call ourselves, "Hunting Widows" for all of the time my dad and boyfriend have spent sitting up in a tree. After all of my complaining, I finally told my boyfriend I would go hunting with him on his birthday. To be honest, this is something I have secretly always wanted to do. With all of the stress of school, studying and homework I thought this would be a perfect opportunity to get out of the house and enjoy the great outdoors. I bundled up in layers (looking very closely to the picture you posted) and packed a blanket, mittens and some hand warmers. First we had to park his truck in the middle of nowhere and walk a mile out to his tree stand. Then, I had to climb up the tree on 1-inch wide pegs and sit there in the freezing cold for several hours. To most people, this experience may sound miserable, but I actually really enjoyed it. We ended up not seeing any deer and you're right, we barely said a word to each other, but I was proud to show him that I am capable of opening myself to new opportunities. Since this was my first time, I was a bit nervous sitting twenty-five feet up in the air. Staring at the woods and watching the sunset gave me the chance to just sit back and relax, something so rarely I get to do.
ReplyDeleteI never really understood this whole hunting business either. Sure sitting in a tree (if its not -30 outside) could be considered "relaxing." And of course men need their "man time" but I still cant see the appeal. I for one could not go out into the wilderness find a living creature and shoot it down (and then eat it!) I know bambi is just a movie but just think, you could actually be killing a poor fawns parent. I get hunting though, like the point of it, deer get over populated blah blah. When i was little i even liked when my dad brought deer home. I think men find it necessary to go out and hunt because it delves into their natural instincts to go out and kill stuff. It lets them bring home the bacon and all the fun that entails.
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